Shrieks From the Comic Book Id

Honestly, I consider myself a positive person, really. I do tend to nay-say more than I glad hand, but all things considered, I'm not a storm cloud bobbing along with the sole intention of ruining my fellow person or persons' attempt at a good time. With that disclaimer out of the way:



According to the Sydney Morning Herald (?!),

Three years ago, Lazaros and Ben Goldman, a documentary filmmaker, created Superheroes Anonymous, an organised group of real-life superheroes.

Lazaros said there are now roughly 200 fellow superheroes across in US - costumed civilians who patrol the streets behind self-made superhero personas.

Their missions are varied, from conducting homeless and sex worker outreach and picking up rubbish to looking out for crime and teaching first aid skills.

In early September, about 20 members gathered from across the country for a three-day event that included a hip hop concert, beach clean-up and workshops on how to disarm an enemy.

Scavenger, a 28-year-old social worker, stood outside a local coffee shop during a break.

Dressed in a velvet bustier and black tassled bodysock, the tight spandex revealed only her eyes. She said crows and vultures inspired her costume, as they are the recyclers of nature.

Okay. I can't really find emotional distance on this one: what these people are doing makes me sick with rage. If you're going to become a badass vigilante, sweet. Maybe you'll lose an eye, like that one sick bastard.

But this phenomenon just brings one thought to my mind: where are the "Real Life Supervillians?" I'm willing to take the lead on this. Hell, give me a long weekend, a few cans of spray paint and a creative prank and I'm sure I could get one of these jackasses to make me their "nemesis."

What makes me sad is that in the age of Doctor Venture and the like, there are still jackasses like this wandering around and sullying the sacred memory of St. Batman.

And hey, you Black Monday Society jerks - I'm putting you on notice. Unless you want a decent, hard-working supervillian on your back*, hang up this bullshit.

* I'm new at this supervillian thing, and have no criminal record that I'm aware of. It will take me a minute to spray-paint some underthings in metallics and arm myself with legal stink bombs.