Salt City Sinner

posted on x by the Salt City Sinner By now, most of you will have heard that I will not be finishing the remainder of this year as your Defense Against the Dark Arts instructor. Because a number of most hurtful and unseemly rumours have been heard circulating amongst my students, I have kindly been allowed to issue the following clarifications. You WILL still be expected to pass the extemporaneous written examination on “Contract Law In Norse Mythology And The Origins Of Complex Fraud And Trickster Gods” (I suggest you refer to your notes from class throughout May for the purposes of this exercise -- a three page essay should suffice here) . The same does not hold true for my one-day lecture on “Faustian Bargains In Goethe And Marlowe,” however, which has been redacted in its entirety. You are required to find and turn in your notes from this lecture. You will still be expected to perform two simple and one complex banishment(s) to pass your OWLS. Any lecture n...

posted on 12/23/2013 by the Salt City Sinner On Friday, U.S. District Judge Robert Shelby struck down the anti-gay-marriage amendment that Utahns passed by a large majority in 2004, effectively legalizing same-sex marriage in Utah.  The ensuing flurry of activity befits the Beehive State, whose word is "industry," after all. Same-sex couples immediately began snagging their marriage licenses and tying the knot by the hundreds, with some even waiting overnight on Sunday to get their licenses when offices opened this morning. Predictably, Gary Herbert, our dour, doughy Governor, released a flotilla of legal maneuvers, all of which have failed as of the afternoon of December 23 rd , the day before the day before the holiest day of conservative Christian pouting, indignation, and public piety.  Perhaps the most interesting wrinkle in these proceedings has been the decision of some county clerks – indeed, some counties in their entirety – to flat-o...

posted on 12/4/2013 by the Salt City Sinner Bored on a snowy day? Pestered by persistent political perfidy? Looking to limber up your worldview or sprout a proud rack of plenti-pointed paranoias? I have just the fun time activity for you! Think of this post as “interactive” in the sense of a Choose Your Own Adventure book or a dice-and-paper role playing game. Indeed, you will need dice to play this game, which we'll call “Could It Be Or Couldn't It.” CIBOCI will require two six-sided die (or 2d6), the type you can find in any Yahtzee box or dusty old Monopoly set. In a pinch, one could theoretically use the fuzzy dice from one's rear-view mirror, as long as they roll and have six sides. warning: there is a not inconsequential risk this may happen All righty, at this preliminary stage we must separate the goats from the lambs, so to speak, so CHOOSE YOUR OWN INTRODUCTORY SECTION. Those of you who are rational/material types, or purely in this for The Chuckles, g...