Saturday, 12 May 2012

Mitt Romney Speaks At Important Christian Lunatic Asylum

posted on 5/12/2012 by the Salt City Sinner

Mitt "Mittens" Romney! Didn't everybody enjoy his last turn in the bucket?

After getting soundly trounced by ancient desert reptile John McCain in the 2008 Republican primary, Romney is back for more. His entire primary campaign so far (which is, thanks to Texas Armadillo Ron Paul, not technically over) has been like the Republican version of the John Kerry candidacy in 2004 - nobody seems to like him, he was virtually nobody's first choice, but there he is, last man standing, about as welcome as a breakfast of thin gruel and tepid water.

In an apparent attempt to add some red meat to said sad breakfast, and also to dislodge the persistent and unfortunate belief among the Republican base that Romney is a cult member rather than a True Christian*,

Romney delivered today's commencement address at Liberty University, an impressively insane "college" founded by Jerry Falwell. Liberty University is notable for being an accredited institute of higher learning whose geology and palaeontology departments embrace Young Earth Creationism.

Let me repeat that: a degree from this "University" is considered valid, but their geology and palaeontology departments assert  that our planet is only six thousand years old. They base that assertion on a loose and self-contradicting set of religious texts, some of which are as old as Astarte and others written hundreds of years after Christ's death by people who never knew him.

Liberty University also took the bold step of banning Campus Democrats in 2009. I double dog dare you to find a lefty college that has outright banned Campus Republicans or any other conservative group. I am beginning to detect a pattern here.

Conservative American Christians bitch and whine more than any group I have encountered in my life, and I'm willing to bet that most people of my generation would agree. I feel bad for Mitt Romney - these are awful, spiteful people to be held in thrall by.

If your "base" consists of ignorant, elderly zealots who haven't even read (let alone understood in context) their sacred tomes, well, I guess dignity, self-integrity and honesty are predictable casualties.

*: I find it especially interesting that so many Christian Theocrat organizations have "Liberty" in their names or cite the founding fathers, considering that their sole purpose of existence is to persecute anybody who isn't Christian.