Posted 11/2/12 by Law Nerd, Esq.
I have only been technically able to "practice" law for the past week and a half, having been sworn in on the 25th of October in Montpelier, Vermont, the wee-est capital in the nation. I will spend the next few years waiting for competence, as befits a profession that prides itself on obscurity and minutiae, and puts a $200,000 price tag on entry. In my short time as a patient young associate, I have learned:
That it is important to ask the court to accept your evidence if you intend to use it to prove, you know, your case;
to master the ability to translate chicken scratch;
that it's scary to sign your name;
that wearing a well-fitting suit feels like battle armor;
to ask the harried partner his precise expectations, else fumbling ensues;
that attending actual court hearings is about 3% as interesting as Court TV makes it out to be; and
the unspeakable joy of having my own office, complete with my own stapler.